Of Rueful Regrets.

Exactly a year from this date, i made a complete fool of myself.
Exactly a year from this date, my strong convictions were shattered.
Exactly a year from this date, i was disshevelled.
Exactly a year from this date, i became lachrymose.

In Abe's words, my life has been like a sine graph in retrospect. It certainly has its ups, but Ive experienced more downs than the ups put together this year itself. Despite all that I managed to pick myself up, dust myself off and ready to try again. I have dumped my emotional baggage since and starting to feel more durable and mature now. I've gained a new zest for life. I strongly believe my inhibitons has subsided and with 2006 just around the corner, i have a gut feeling it will be a good year indeed *crosses fingers*. I had enuff of 2005. Good riddance to a wicked and demented year. Now go fix urselves.

The Vichuda Incident.

"Dude.., u look familliar man! Have we met before? I swear i've seen u around".
That's twice this week.
And that came out from an indo-chinese Melbourne permanent resident.
Confirm muka aku muka bersepah.

My 15 mins of fame.

Here's a lil' recap of wat happened yesterday...

6:00a.m - Woke up and took a shower.
6:15a.m - Called Aryn to reconfirm the meeting spot. Headed straight to Shiroku Productions in Damansara Perdana.
6:30a.m - Got there early..had a ciggy, mingled wit sum of the cast (which i must say are total dorks)
7:00a.m - had a drink wit Aryn and his friend Suhaimi at a nearby mamak whilst waiting for the crew and host to prepare their shit.
7:30a.m - We're off to the studio for the shoot.

6 and half hours later...

Aryn : Hello, wei Ben kaunye pasal la ni...suruh aku masuk show ni..how la now?
Ben aka Faidz : Hello..dude..seriously, u need to chill man..u look freakin' nervous dude..but so far ure doing ok..
Aryn : I hope so...So..wat do u think la...which one shud i pick?
Ben aka Faidz : Hmmm...well im glad u've eliminated the first 2...theyre not ur type anyway.. in my opinion, i think u shud go for Arlia...She has the best personality and the hottest by far...
Aryn : Wat abt Nabilah..? she's kinda interesting..
Ben aka Faidz : Dude..U dun want Nabilah...trust me! she's a wee bit cocky.. Yani however is cute...but judging frm the previous questions....she sounds a bit bimbo-ish...ARLIA dude..ARLIA..
Aryn : U sure ar..wat shud i ask her for the last question?
Ben aka Faidz : okok...hmmm..ask her this...how wud she describe herself, is she more of a 'spicy cili padi' kinda gal...OR...more of a 'nasi putih' kinda chika...ASK HER THAT!!
Aryn : Nasi putih? gile..
Ben aka Faidz : tanya je la..
Aryn : ok..

Well that was my whole scene...my 15 mins of fame..for most part of the dialogue i actually ad-libbed. The only scripted part was the spicy cili padi question...nonetheless the producer loved it...it looked as if we were actually bestfriends aryn n i...I had to wait that long ffor my shot. But it was really fun tho...had an interesting conversation wit the hosts, Rina n Naz.. i was kinda flattered when Rina commented on the way i dress...she said i look like one of the cast from OC..hehehe.. (awww shucks)..shit gay moment right now..hehehe...all in all, it went well... hope the tv station lovees the mock-up episode...here's to another 15 mins...

The G5, the G-Man and sum reality show.

Ahhh..finally i get to blog after days and days of heavy deadlines. Not much has happened, but I have to say that today the new PowerMac G5 has arrived. Uhuh...now we have 3 g5's in the office. Finally i get to have my own cubicle with a new powerful machine that cud edit videos professionally (so dudes, if u wanna do sumthing, let's do it while im still working there..hehe). Prior to this I was foist to work with a dumbass machine, which is acceptable if we're working on 1 magazine. But we have 2 magz now and soon another one coming in march. So... now senang skit kerja wit the new machines. Alhamdullillah. The company spent like 76k for the machine and printers alone. hehe..pity for them i wont be there long..but i do feel a wee bit of guilt slowly creeping in. Oh well!

Anyhoo, I was offered to be part of a reality program which is sort of like MTV's "Wanna Come In", I think. I'll be the 'dating-guru/stud' who'll help the 'Dud' by coaching them how to dress and offer them directions thru out the date via an ear transmitter. I'll be in a seperate room and monitor the date. I think. But seriously, I'm the last person to give anybody any advice on dressing let alone dating. I cant even get a date for myself dammit! Too shy la..hihihi (laughs like a schoolgirl) I aint a playa, but i cud try and pretend to be one. Hehehe...here's where the acting skills come to play. I aint a bad actor ok...was once offered to be part of Sepet ok...dun play2. The shoot's on thursday, so i gotta figure out a believable lie to get myself off work... Probably take another mc...or half day..coz the shoot's gonna start frm early mornin' till the afternoon. Plus i have to go for this Mac class later that evening to learn the basics of using the G5. sheeessh... oooh...the G-man's back by the way, for christmas hols..hehe.. i'll be seeing him tomoro for dinner and we'll have our usual racist banter along with Darren...1 cina, 1 india, 1 malay... Besss...confirm havoc! hahaha..

More Afdlin and co.

Actorlympics ppl..any takers? Im booking the tix. Check the poster out for the date and time. Ring me up or txt me if any of u are interested...I highly recommend u catch the show. Klakar tak ingat dunia...

So sick.

I've been working late for the past 4 days. I'm fucking exhausted, its not funny wei... now i can sort of comprehend the life of an auditor. Catching deadlines is such a bummer. In my case, the editorial crew is freakin' disorganized. biasala..melayu.. habis rosak routine gym.. dammit! Just have to bear with it for a couple of months more... shite!

Selamba derk...

ek-enneeenn, cam michael jackson la beb....

'O' is for that overtime I'm putting in.

'Tis the last month of the year and i have to say throughout most of '05, i have been at the lowest point in my life. Im not proud to admit it, but yes, i totally let myself down. Everything fell apart like a chain reaction. Frm a breakup to losing a job and to other incidents not worth mentioning. All because of my own doings. I never actually recovered completely from the breakup. It all went downhill from there. The first few months was really bad, I became so negative, tetchy, and emotionally frail. But fortunately, i am blessed with great friends. And they helped me thru my downfall, picked me up and brushed the dirt off my body and got me on my feet again.

Things started picking up mid '05. Abe came back, introduced me to strangers that eventually became family. Had a great time with abe and the RPI family. It was an adventure indeed. Frm creating a music video to Bora Ombak and the karaoke session..That was the highlight for this year.

And now, i recently signed up for a Fitness First membership. Just got back frm the gym at the Curve and i must say, it was excruciating. It was my first time ever in a gym and doing proper fitness regimes, thanks to the guidance of Azree. No pain no gain. But it was well worth it. I intended to join the gym for quite some time now but just short of cash. Plus i wasnt working before, but now i am. And the main goal is to be lean and buff within 3-4 months. i believe it is achievable. It can be done. Aiming for Omarion's physique. and hopefully by march 06 i am able to bash Faizal or other weakling friends of mine. hehehe...insya-allah. 2006 is so gonna be a great year. I can just feel it. Plus, Borders just open at The Curve...after an intense work out, hot shower and then chilling at Borders wit a book and a cuppa. My perfect and ideal life. The only thing missing is companionship. itu blakang cerita....